I miss you so much. I never listend to them Jacob; I never listened to those people who said I should get over you. There is no time limit on recovery, there is no reasonable amount of time before I should move on, it can't be defined. I miss you so much and I wish I could explain the feeling of trying to cope inside your heart and mind exactly how long forever is; how long forever is until I see you. This is the end, I know the true meaning of regret; I'm aware that it is impossible to go back in time; I know wishing to change the past gets you exactly no where. I have my bad days, my days where I remember you, and miss you more than anything else I can fathom. I've never felt such pain through a death. Maybe it's because I know it could have been resolved; that it wasn't fate because you made the decision that you didn't want to live anymore. I think that's what anyone who is a survivor of suicide feels and can never surpass. The fact that it wasn't meant to be, but happened anyway.